Wendy and Nils


Washington Story
According to all legal taxation accounting practices and forms of stipulation, this latest round of travel to Washington State was a “business” trip relating to education in our field of study.  Wendy had four days of formal classes in Seattle, and so long as I follow a few simple guidelines, I am allowed to write off basically any expense, considering the fact that I’m self-employed.  Below is a bullet point outline describing the overall highlights of our trip.

Departure and Washington Arrival
  • You can skateboard in Logan Airport terminal without getting in trouble, so pack light and travel fast.
  • TSA Issue #1: Woman in line in front of us didn’t know liquids are not allowed on airplanes.  She lost hundreds of $$$ in Victoria Secret perfumes, nail polish, and feminine douche products.
  • TSA Issue #2: Wendy argued with TSA agent because the hunting knife she was carrying on to airplane was supposedly “TSA approved”.  Her buck knife got confiscated!
  • Wendy does not read entire car rental agreement before committing to and signing contract.  First time ever!!
 
Washington State – Mt. St. Helen’s – Mt. Rainer – Ginkgo Petrified Forest
  • It takes a lot longer to get to Mt. St. Helen’s than it looks on the map.
  • It costs $8 to visit the Johnston Ridge Observatory but there are no formal fee stations, so if you don’t feel like paying, then simply don’t pay.
  • If you don’t want to endure the hassles of backcountry conditions, Mt. St. Helens offers helicopter tours and fine dining.
  • When you purchase a beer at the Mt. Rainer gift shop, a ranger will offer to open for you, and you are encouraged to take your open container with you on a walk or drive thru the park.
  • If you walk in the snow near Mt. Rainer, you might want to wear better shoes than Converse All-Stars, unless of course you like your feet to be drenched in water and cold while hiking such as Nils does.
  • The gift shop at the Gingko Petrified Forest is more fun than the actual national park.  At the national park the petrified wood is literally locked up behind cages.

Seattle
  • The light rail from SeaTac to Seattle is extra convenient, but it may give you similar symptoms to morning sickness if your name begins with a ‘W’.
  • People don’t jaywalk in Seattle, which is probably a good idea now that marijuana is legal, and pedestrians/cars would be just one more thing to have to pay attention to while you are stoned.
  • If you want relatives who live in Portland, OR to visit you in Seattle, WA give them more than an hour’s notice so they can make travel plans.  The two cities are not connected by teleportation devices.
  • Skateparks are free and totally awesome, so long as it’s not raining.
  • If you take a picture from the Columbia Center Observation Deck at night with your flash on, it will look like aliens are invading.
  • Everyone drinks coffee in Seattle, so if you want to drink alcohol while visiting your favorite tourist attractions, just fill your coffee cup with an alcoholic beverage, and no one will suspect that you are violating open container regulations.
  • Arguing in public while on vacation is good for your relationship?

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